Not Sorry

Keep on looking through the window again,
But I’m not sorry if I do insult you.
I’m sad, not sorry, ’bout the way that things went,
And you’ll be happy and I’ll be forsakin’ thee.

I swore I’d never feel like this again,
But you’re so selfish, you don’t see
What you’re doing to me,
I keep on looking through the window again.
No I’m not sorry if I do insult you.
No-o-o, I’m not sorry if I do insult you.

I need to stop, obviously, saying that I’m done writing about Alice/Brittany. I annoy myself, you could say. I care so much about a person who’s not worth caring for and then when it’s all done, everyone around me wonders why I cared about that person at all.

It became so bad I don’t remember or can’t figure out any of the good qualities that she may have possessed. I was angry with her so much it clouded and permeated everything. Being in that friendship with her proved to me time and again that she was incapable of loving or caring about anyone outside of herself. Her feelings toward you were conditional.

She replaces people, and quite easily. When I became friends with her, I replaced Lacy. I was told I was a better friend than Lacy. We get in a fight about Matt’s dad coming to see the kids and suddenly Lacy is a better friend than me because Lacy, when it was found that Matt Sr. was cheating, became angry and called his girlfriend an umpteenth amount of times calling her a slut/whore/stupid bitch. I’m not sorry that my maturity level lacks that of a 17-year-old’s.

I’m not sorry that I was there before Lacy came down, taking care of Brittany’s kids while she was holed up in her room sobbing on the floor. Who did she call when she needed her kids to be looked after while she wallowed in her pity? Me. Anything she needed, I was there. I’m not sorry that I was the one being a shoulder to lean on and trying to keep her from calling him all the time and begging him to love her and acting desperate. Because she went against my advice, Matthew actually told her that when he was here in June, she was simply a pity-fuck.

I know how men like him work, you sob and get all needy and they react with anger and become repulsed because, honestly, only the sick and twisted are turned on by tears, desperation and faking happiness like everything is going to return to normal. You get angry and harass their girlfriend, their girlfriend gets the idea “Oh, wow. She IS a crazy bitch, no wonder you’re leaving her.” You lose all credibility. I’m not sorry for not being Lacy.

Dipshidiot gets out of jail and he is living with her and she has again easily replaced me. Brian was her fuck-toy when Disphidiot was holed up and for a short while she was replacing me with Brian. Brian says something off to her kid and has one bad lay with her and gone is Brian, and I’m back in. Just in time to dog sit for her while she’s away.

Brittany has to depend on someone. She is far from self-sufficient and that is why she makes the perfect candidate for Dipshidiot. She has no friends here besides me and we’re no longer friends. Lacy lives in Georgia. All Brittany has here is her mom and grandparents. Dipshidiot has hit the jackpot — for the qualities he is looking for.

Keep on looking through the window again,
But I’m not sorry if I do insult you.
I’m sad, not sorry, ’bout the way that things went,
And you’ll be happy and I’ll be forsakin’ thee.

I swore I’d never feel like this again,
But you’re so selfish,
You don’t see what you’re doing to me,
I keep on looking through the window again.
No I’m not sorry if I do detest you.
No-o-o, I’m not sorry if I do detest you.

Brittany texted me Marry Christmas yesterday. It may have been a blast text, I don’t know. I texted her back a little over an hour later Merry Christmas and nothing since. I’m wondering if she thought I was correcting her. I wasn’t, but I would find it funny if she thought so.

Related articles

• Leaving a Bad Taste in my Mouth (combatbabe.com)
• Dipshidiot? Is There a Dipshidiot in the House? (combatbabe.com)
• Searches, Dipshidiot, and Rantage Oh My! (combatbabe.com)
• Dipshidiot Victory!!! (combatbabe.com)
• An Ode to Dipshidiot (combatbabe.com)