Leaving a Bad Taste in my Mouth

I don’t know why I am holding onto a friendship with Alice. I often wonder if it isn’t for the sake of her 20 month year old daughter, Molly. Also for her 5 year old son, Matthew, whom just recently completely unprompted told me, “I love you, Sarah.” That is huge for him to say that as it’s always been his belief that he couldn’t love me because he loves mommy. It’s cute how 5 year olds think like that.

I wanted to push Brian (not to be confused with Dipshidiot) out of Alice’s life because he’s a bum without a job and said some of the most crude and ridiculous things. Case in point, for some reason with Brian, Alice was telling him how she had a hard time looking Dipshidiot in the eyes and Brian came back with, “It’s probably because you’re afraid he’s going to beat you.” I hate Dipshidiot, but I just find that really tasteless to say. He one also told me that he was going to get Dipshidiot to punch me in the face. Mind you, Brian also has a domestic violence charge on his record.

When did Alice realize Brian was not good to have around herself and the kids? When she picked up Matthew from the bus stop yesterday and asked him if he’d like her to call daddy (Matthew Senior). Matt’s response was “Daddy won’t pick up the phone for you because he doesn’t love you anymore. And that’s why daddy doesn’t call us anymore.” That silenced Alice for a moment until she carefully asked, “And who told you that?” and Matt simply said, “Brian.”

How completely immature and idiotic, not to mention cruel, do you have to be to tell a 5 year old that? And how dumb does Alice have to be to instead of telling me while Matt is preoccupied with something, tell it to me in front of him AND ask him to reiterate what he said?? She didn’t even reassure him that it was false information.

She hated the fact that Matthew Sr. picked out something for Matt that she didn’t ask him to give Matt. She was asking me to find out how expensive it was and bitching about this that and the other. It’s a gift, Matt will LOVE it, I even think it’s cool. She needs to learn some appreciation. It’s Matthew Sr.’s money. He gives her enough to make her comfortable as she doesn’t work. She is able to pay her bills, feed and clothe her kids and afford nightly take-out. She got a text from Matthew Sr. last night where he told her he put in an amount of money for her in their joint account and to use it wisely. I knew she was fuming about the wisely part. He gave her more than he normally gives her, but it wasn’t enough for her. They have a 3 or 4 day Disney trip next week, she needs to put money aside for bills, bitch, bitch, bitch. I know he told her to use it wisely because he’s Generally Discharged from the Military come April, i.e. no money. I ended up pulling the card: there are people out there who don’t have any family left, are losing their homes and living on the streets. She has a roof over her head, food in her kitchen, 2 clothed well cared for kids and a great family around her supporting her. She texted Matthew Sr. back with a “Thank you” instead of the bitching she wanted to do. I told her she took the higher road doing that. Tis the motherfucking season, time to be thankful and happy.

So we had Brian brainwashing her kid’s head and now Dipshidiot wants to step in and “be the father that Matthew Sr. never was”.

AIN’T NOTHIN’ BUT A GANGSTA WHITE TRASH PARTY!

Back to Back Awards, w00t!

So I had just gotten home from Alice’s when I logged onto thee WordPress and received notification that the ever so kind Not Quite Alice* who loverly gave a nomination to me for Blog of the Year (2012) Award. She’s really a lovely girl and each post she writes is with such emotion that whatever she conveys in that post, you can feel to. It’s more than just relatable. She could seriously be complaining why the sky has to be blue and you will find yourself as angry about it as she is. Though, to be honest, she has never complained about the sky. But if she had, now you know how you’d feel, too. See what I did there?

OFFICIAL BLOG OF THE YEAR (2012) RULES

1 Select the blog(s) you think deserve the ‘Blog of the Year 2012’ Award

2 Write a blog post and tell us about the blog(s) you have chosen – there’s no minimum or maximum number of blogs required – and ‘present’ them with their award.

3 Please include a link back to this page ‘Blog of the Year 2012’ Award – http://thethoughtpalette.co.uk/our-awards/blog-of-the-year-2012-award/   and include these ‘rules’ in your post (please don’t alter the rules or the badges!)

4 Let the blog(s) you have chosen know that you have given them this award and share the ‘rules’ with them

5 You can now also join our Facebook group – click ‘like’ on this page ‘Blog of the Year 2012’ Award Facebook group and then you can share your blog with an even wider audience

6 As a winner of the award – please add a link back to the blog that presented you with the award – and then proudly display the award on your blog and sidebar … and start collecting stars…

PEOPLE CHEAT SO HERE ARE THE UNOFFICIAL RULES WHICH ARE VERY SIMILAR TO SUNSHINE BLOG AWARD RULES

Blog the Year (2012) Blogger Award Rules

  1. Display the award logo on your blog.
  2. Link back to the person who nominated you.  (check, check, check it out)
  3. State 5 things about yourself. (it’s below)
  4. Pass the award onto random other bloggers and link to one of their specific posts so that they get notified by ping back (that will come give it time)
  5. Link back to the Blog of the Year 2012 Rules page so people can read the real, complete, and fully accurate rules of this slightly-different blogger award   (Copy and paste are my friends) 

Things you’ve been dying to know.

  1. I was addicted to cocaine for a bit. Fun times, but I wouldn’t do it again.
  2. I was a huge pot head from the age of 14 until just this year. It increased after the “incident”.
  3. I’ve never thought I’d like cats, but I find myself more curious since I’m no longer allergic. Downfalls? Litter boxes and sharp little claws.
  4. I hate hamburger meat in spaghetti. Italian sausage only.
  5. I’m falling out of love with hamburger, steak, chicken drumsticks and pork chops. Brace yourself. I can only get down half a piece of bacon before I don’t want it anymore. Maybe my body is going through its own natural selection and wants only veggies, tofu and sushi/sashimi.

My Carefully Selected Nominees:

Tracy Fulks: Her dry, sarcastic wit with such imagination behind it all leaves me gobsmacked. I did a double backflip when she once told Le Clown that he brightened her day like Monistat to a yeast infection. I will never stop bringing that up, Tracy. She has been through a lot and is real about it. She is not afraid to tell her stories and experiences and has the natural ability to throw humor into them if need be. Or if she just wants to. Tracy, I am happy to know the monkey’s off your back. Truly. Thank you for gracing us with your motherfucking presence.

Le Clown: He doesn’t need this award, he gets praised enough and if you’d told me 2-3 weeks ago I’d be gracing him with a nomination I would have told you that you’re bat shit crazy and get the hell out of here. I first heard about Le Clown when he was featured on the Daily Post with I think 10 questions. His responses were humorous so I liked him. So I clicked to check out his blog and basically took in the layout before the Seroquel was knocking me out. I forgot about him until I started really blogging and he was fucking everywhere! Needless to say, I felt like he was being shoved down my throat like politicians are during election year. I begin regurgitating when this happens. It turned into like, hate, love relationship, very one sided–my side, until I actually got to kind of know him. I forgive him of his Megalomania and we’re cool. His blog is awesome and he does a lot with the community and Movember and he doesn’t act like a cock and ignore you when you comment, he really replies. He’s a good lad. End story.

Teeny Bikini: She’s funny. She has Jiggly Bits. She makes lists. She’s had limited uneventful sexual encounters. She gives excellent advice. You should just check her out. If you don’t like her what are you doing HERE?

Michelle W.: Read her. I have no words for her. She is an acquired taste, but once you’ve acquired it there will be no going back. She’s the north to my south.

___________________

*Alice and Not Quite Alice are 2 very different people. Other words, no relation.

Who me? Couldn’t be.

I swear I didn’t touch the damn cookies. What crumbs on my mouth? Bugger off, I have an award ceremony to participate in. Oh? You don’t believe me, you say? Take a seat, rest your bum. Stay with me for some fun.

Rarasaur, yes, Rarasaur nominated me ever so sweetly for the Sunshine Blog Award. I think you get to make up your own reasons why you carefully selected your nominees. All I know is I felt all melty inside when she used the terms ‘witty’, ‘fierce’ and ‘insightful’ in relation to me, CB or Sarah. I’m still awestruck. If you haven’t read her hilarious blog, you are truly missing out. So if you get bored with award ceremonies, this is your chance to dip out and go see her. She’s effing fabulous. As noted, here and here, but you must read more in order to truly take in the essence that is Rara.

Sunshine Blogger Award Rules

  1. Display the award logo on your blog.
  2. Link back to the person who nominated you.
  3. State 5 things about yourself.
  4. Pass the award onto 6 other bloggers and link to one of their specific posts so that they get notified by ping back.

Five Things About Me:

  1. I quit smoking cigarettes on 4/20 which is affectionately known as National Smoke Out Day for pot heads.
  2. I don’t like apologies so I don’t give them that much. I am combative, but I won’t say something I don’t mean. Apologies are similar to lies in my head. You call me a cunt. You obviously meant it when you said it or you wouldn’t have said it. Saying, “Sorry, I didn’t mean it” is bullshit. You said it, you meant it, will you think I am again? Maybe you will or won’t. Will you learn not to call me it again? Yes, but don’t apologize about saying it in the first place. You still felt that way. Sorry fixes nothing, it’s a Band-Aid without the Neosporin.
  3. I love hearing ranting; comedians, friends, neurotic squirrels.
  4. I was so infatuated with Ellen DeGeneres at one point I considered going lez. Yeah, I realized then and right away sexuality was not a “lifestyle choice.”
  5. I always wanted to be a fag hag. That sounds fucked. Have they come out with a politically correct term for that yet? I want a male gay best friend. I wanted one before Sex and the City so don’t think that spooled it, it just fueled it when that show came about.

I hereby pass this award onto these 6 bloggers:

Rohan7things: For being really smart and artsy. I like smart and artsy.
http://rohan7things.wordpress.com/2012/11/29/easiest-way-to-quit-smoking-give-up-shut-up/

MySpokenHeart: Her name says it all. She’s beautiful. Need I say more?
http://myspokenheart.wordpress.com/2012/11/27/need-vs-love/

CrimsonOwl63: Her words are honest and her stories and feelings relatable. I will always read.
http://crimsonowl63.wordpress.com/2012/11/26/a-few-days-off/

Jet: She’s strong. Intelligent. Keeps her head up for herself and her girls. Is my parenting role model.
http://sustainablysingleparenting.wordpress.com/2012/11/28/its-almost-time/

Fictional Machines: Talk about talented. I don’t know if he does blog awards, I’d be shocked if he did, but he deserves this as his writing is a-mazing!
http://fictionalmachines.com/2012/11/25/progression-40/

RightToBitch: Adam S., curator of the blog, I met through the link below. We are best friends. Stay tuned for our Happily Ever After.
http://righttobitch.com/2012/11/21/art-blogging-vs-conversational-blogging/

*CrankyGiraffe: She is smart, funny and not afraid to show her vulnerable side.
http://crankygiraffe.wordpress.com/2012/11/26/it-comes-with-the-territory/

*I can cheat as I am special. Love, Peace & Happy Treez. ^_^

Dipshidiot? Is There a Dipshidiot in the House?

Nope. Unfortunately, Ladies & Gents, he is still locked up. Really unfortunate for me though, news from his public defender (‘his lawyer’ sounds too posh; ass doesn’t make enough to afford one—that may be neither here nor there, but I am a bitch to his dipshidiotness.) that he will be released from jail December 12th and will be required to take anger management.

Need me not tell you, anger management was required and completed by my nephew’s “father” due to a domestic violence charge with another one of his baby mamas BEFORE he tried, and failed miserably thanks to my sister’s other guy friend who walked in, to sexually assault my sister. No, no, anger management is the cure all, don’t be so disheartened.

If Alice ever reads this, she’ll want to kill me. Alice had sex with Brian (I don’t have a pet name for Brian because I think he is seriously the dumbest person I ever met. Not just ignorant with the ability to learn, straight out dumb. Not even Fucktard would suffice and I love the term Fucktard.) some night after Thanksgiving, I believe, it was terrible and she kicked him out. She was sober so it wasn’t like she was blitzed or anything. The cats away the mice will play may be sufficient for this if she wasn’t oozing and dripping and whatever in love with Dipshidiot. They met August 31st. It’s only Thanksgiving, all his shit he told her were outright lies and he’s been locked up for 2 & 1/2 months of all this. In the letters they talk about love and marriage and futures and shit that makes me want to hurl… continuously… until I’m dead from hurling. Have I mentioned I hate hurling?

A little funny good on this. She sent him pictures of HER kids and herself and Dobby (HER dog) and they denied Dipshidiot to have a certain picture. It wasn’t a nude, it was a picture of him and HIS son. He’s in there for violating a restraining order that protects his ex wife and his son that was the result of a domestic violence charge. Did they really think the jail would let him have that picture? He has a violence in him that I can see with my naked eye. He’s an alcoholic, his best friend is Jack. HELLO!! This is a Red Alert. This is a Red Alert!

Then his bunk got tossed and all the pictures he had were taken and destroyed. They were taped to his ceiling, maybe they thought it was pervy. I think so. He mentions in a letter that he loves waking up to his family every morning. Gag. He also said, “I can’t wait to see Brian and Sarah’s faces when they see how happy we are together as a family…”. Even just typing that now brings to the surface something fierce. He having the audacity to write my name alone makes me see red. Oh and by the way, Dipshidiot, Brian just fucked ‘your girl’ about 2 nights ago or so. Just saying.

He wrote an entire paragraph because Alice told Molly she was on the phone with her dad.  He was so happy hearing Alice refer to him as Molly’s dad. He just knew that Alice thought of him that way. He will always be Molly’s father. If I go further I am going to hurl and start breaking shit.

Go after Alice all you want. DO NOT talk about Molly that way. You will never be her father. Need I not remind you that you can’t get near your own kid AND it wasn’t until I (ME, SARAH) found out you had another child due to a Child Support case you had against you in 2006 did you ever mention you had an older child. Still need I remind you, you signed AWAY your rights to that child. Yeah, baby mama went to prison and Dipshidiot didn’t want to be responsible. You make a motherfucking outstanding Father. I see you look at Molly wrong and I won’t have to be a Mama Bear to fuck your shit up.

Granted Molly’s father may be a total ass, but he will always be Molly’s father. How Alice doesn’t see how sick and twisted Dipshidiot is goes well beyond me. Maybe it’s because she’s his type. No self esteem, vulnerable, easily manipulated. He’s even started copying her spelling and grammar mistakes. She has 32 letters and I’ve picked up each letter gets more and more like hers, it’s his handwriting with her language. Glad is glade, our is are, you’re is your, etc. The last two letters I read, if it had not been in his handwriting I would have thought Alice had written them.

He’s a sick, twisted, sociopathic motherfucker and in my next life I am definitely going to be a criminal profiler.

Dipshidiot Victory!!!

Search Views
dooce husband 1
bella swan fake porn photos 1
bella swan fakes 1
reason why robert frost wrote the road not taken 1
dipshidiot 1

These are the search terms from the last 7 days. They amuse me, more so the 5th one.

Dooce Husband. That’s a given. I think on average I mention Dooce every other post. How often does she mention me, you ask? Never. That doesn’t matter though. My love runneth over. And that dream I had of us chilling like old pals means we’re likethis. Until she notifies the authorities that I blog about her too much and I end up in blogosphere jail. It’s cool, Heather, I’ll still love ya.

Bella Swan Fake Porn Photos? Er. Um. Really? Yes, I have written about Bella and Edward in ONE post. But besides that, the FAKE is what gets you going? You need to let your shrink know this information. Could be pertinent to your treatment.

Bella Swan Fakes. Either they, too or the same person really needs to see those photos. Sorry man/woman/child/horny teenage boy/pervy old man to disappoint. Good luck on your endeavor.

Reason Why Robert Frost Wrote The Road Not Taken. Sorry I couldn’t tell you. But now you have me curious. Were you doing a book report? A thesis? Is there some controversial rumor over that poem and Robert Frost?? Drop me a line if you ever come back.

Dipshidiot. You’re the freaking WINNER this round. Oh yeah. Hopefully you weren’t looking for an exact simple definition because what I wrote about Dipshidiot was none of that. Be looking for some more rants of Dipshidiot in the near future as Alice and I are still friends besides what I may have said here & here. #1 I am a softy. #2 I’m an unconditional love-er (not to be confused with lover, sorry I fail to fall into the lez category. Alice is highly disappointed about that. It’s OK if you are, too.) when it comes to my friendships. I seriously have SOOOOOOO much to tell you on Dipshidiot I cannot wait. Oh the wrath. I need to stop now and save for a future post that may strike as early as tomorrow morning. I can feel your anticipation.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 405 other followers

%d bloggers like this: